Just Another Manic Wednesday
Stress is winding down and I am a happy camper... four more instructional days and three exam days. Then grading exams. Then grading tenth grade assessments. Ok. Maybe I'm only mostly almost done. But it feels good anyway.
So it was a great weekend. Katie and Steve are now another set of Mr. & Mrs. Lilly, David got to meet yet another set of everyones and we danced like very happy maniacs. Sigh. Such fun.
Sunday we met Amy for church, saw his family (I like them!) and headed out to Nordhouse Dunes for a bit of R & R. It was lovely, we both got burned and the doggie got much better at "come" (and believing I have some authority past simply having opposable thumbs). He was also pretty good in the tent--only kicked me a couple of times and only walked on my face once (hey, even the cat doesn't do that well some nights).
Monday we hiked up and down the beach and got burned. Then drove home in the scary traffic.
Now to fully apprecite the situation you need to know the last time I drove a stick was in Zimbabwe on the left side of the road. The time before that was just after high school on a truck. Needless to say both David and I were glad to find it was pretty easy to remember--him because it meant he only had to drive back to Cincinnati instead of all eight-plus hours and me because I hate being bad at things that could potentially cause the death of me and others.
But there's more. 'long about the time we hit stop-and-go traffic on the highway, Grayson started farting. Horrible, racid, knock-the-breath-out-of-you farts. Farts to make other dogs cower. This might have been useful on the beach to keep flies and other buggery away, but in a enclosed space, it was, um, much less than welcome.
So picture yourself stopped in the car next to us, looking out and seeing this: a young couple in a small car. He's trying to explain the term "riding the clutch" to her while she seems to be wrestling an alligator in her lap (this is me trying to get the thing into and out of first without stalling and with neither foot touching the floor--bad angle on the pedals. All of a sudden they get panicked looks on their faces and begin wildly rolling down the windows, shutting off the air conditioning and gasping for air. The windows roll up, the guy pulls out a question book, the car goes forward ten feet, the car stalls, the car jumps to life, the windows desperately roll down, wait, roll up, they talk, the car inches forward. Repeat for five miles. Mmm... it was fun anyway.
Yesterday we had the memorial for the girls. I cried a little. There was some very bad poetry, very good music and a bit of messy grief. And the world continues onward.
So I took
this test ('cause I'm a teacher and like tests. Not really, but oh well). The only thing that concerns me is that I have "average masculinity". I'm consoled by the fact I have "very high femininity", but I have to wonder who's defining femininity and masculinity here? I don't think I do maleness very well. So there.
Bad Day to Wear Sandals
So far we’ve had bunnies with “2006” painted on their butts and lovely little brown hens in the high school hallways. It’s the Seniors’ last day and apparently they’ve decided that with their collective exit we just won’t have enough wildlife around here. In a few hours this will seem funnier (well, it’s already funny), but right now I’m grossed out by my wet leather sandal that still smells slightly of chicken shit.
Pottery Class
Ok, I'm really doing this. Class size is limited to twelve, but I'd love company. Monday evening session.
On the list of trivial things that currently blow my mind...
ABC has a streaming feature on their website which allows viewers to watch full episodes of some of my favorite shows. I just finished watchign the season finale of
Desperate Housewives!
Day two.
Well, the day continued and we all got through it. The part that continued to bug me was the whole series of "would you miss me if I died?" questions. In all truth, I would grieve any of my students--if I didn't care I would
not bother with this job. But then counselors always say to not encourage that line of thinking because of the risk of attention-getting suicides.
It's all rather pathetic isn't it? This mitigated greif.
Went dress shopping with Emily last night. Wow. Amazing to see her as a bride. 'Bout time I suppose.
Grief is a funny thing. As I watch my students go through it, I find myself having a hard time taking some of them seriously. Perhaps it’s right of youth to grieve or to take on the attributes of grief openly, messily and without reserve but I resent it. Students that didn’t even know Emily are in tears and tears and tears today. I got told six minutes before class. When do I get to fall apart? Perhaps it’s the responsibility of age to be stoic. To hold a semblance of normalcy on such a hard day. Perhaps I’m irrational for being irritated that the mourning is so public and each student is putting out waves of emotion and forcing me to submerge my own because they each want to be the center.
So I keep teaching
Raisin and wonder about the funeral.
In simple form, this was the weekend and the sequence:
Friday I left for Cincinnati and got down there at 9. We went to a fabulous restaurant called Slim’s that I’m completely unsure I’m cool enough to be in.
Saturday we cleaned house for a BBQ. It was quite and ordeal (but if we can make it through that….). Then we had the BBQ. It was cool to be doing it as “we”. Many of the guests just accepted me as lady of the house and wondered when I was moving down. Hmm. We wandered in the gloaming at the dog park and rented “Talk to Her” from an independent video store in the neighborhood that I think I will love. The movie was interesting—very strange premise but it managed to make a very creepy situation and very creepy guy both sympathetic and quietly humorous.
Sunday we did the Presbyterian thing with Aunt Kay and Uncle Ron. It was fun to see youth Sunday as Riverview doesn’t do one. Then back to the house for brunch & pictures. My hair is a shocking shade of orange at the moment. I think I need to adjust this. Then we did the dog park again and came home and napped. I love napping.
There was still some yard work to be done so we planted roses and talked to more neighbors, eventually getting a tour of the house and grounds of one of them who is nearly a movie character.
And I got home at one a.m. so I slept a little late and did not watch the news this morning while I snarfed down my eggs and did not know that Emily was reported injured and her sister reported dead by the media when it was really the reverse and had to find out about it just before class and I have to figure out and figure in the viewing and the funeral which really aren’t about me at all but my heart is so heavy anyway. There have been too many.
Too many.
Annoying Questions
Guy friends: Do you wear your pants so low on your hips that when you bend over your underwear shows? If this is a trend everyone is following, I'd feel better about it. It distrubs me greatly to know ANYTHING about my students' underwear.
All friends: Is it so wrong that I'm not rooting for Meredith Grey and the married doctor guy to get back together? I barely watch the show but I keep being stunned by the fact everybody seems to be planning on them getting together when his wife is there trying to patch things up!
Perhaps I have overcommited to this bit of fiction.
Wild Weekend
It's been a full weekend....
Pam and Paula celebrated turning thirty several weeks early. It's amazing to me that the bond we formed in college bible study still holds. It's weird, we only see each other once or twice a year, but we still just step into each others' lives like it's been a week. Love em'.
ARGH! The cat is going to get Jenny! Save her Pete! Save her! Well, he is marrying her. And that's why she was sitting in mortal peril (aka Joey's living room). Their engagement party was fab (even though I was profoundly late to it becasue I had been with David and I am
not good at leaving him) and yet another very good part of the continous 2006 weddings stories.
Aw, her hero.
And then today Mark turned 29. My, my. A full weekend.
In the words of Sandra Ciscernos...
I am sitting my sadness on an elbow tonight. Can't find airfare to somewhere in Europe to see my brother this summer. Correction: I can find airfare,I can't find airfare that will not max out my credit cards. Sigh. If you see a good deal, let me know.
I have seen three interesting things:
1) a truck with balls. Testicles, if you will. Hanging off the trailer hitch. Big and pink and wrinkly. I don't know whether I appreciate the creativity or am simply grossed out.
2) I bought a very cheap but nice white purse with little pleather things that look like the things 50s housewives put on the end of turky legs to make them look less like dead meat. Or fancier dead meat. Either way, I hope they come off.
3)I hit the edge of the microwave door with a full cup of tomato soup yesterday. No more pictures on that side of the fridge.
The End.
Chasing Rabbits
Fun weekend. Emily's engagement done in such a true-to-type pastoral form (He did it in a church by an altar with a ring and a bible engraved with her married name), a quick visit from them, margaritas with Kate (ever try to get a margarita on cinco de mayo? Ech.), sleeping in, Katie's bridal shower, church, yard work, Katie's grad party (with offer of mulch from Joey!)-- so many good people, such a good time. It's interesting, I couldn't aovid teacher talk, but it was interesting to hear Kristen's plans (oh, the things she'll discover!) and Joey's situation... I do miss people when I don't see them.
As for tonight, I'm off to be part of a woodchuck killing posse.
Love is in the air dadadalahdalahdadada!
This is John.
This is Emily.
They got engaged last night!*
* Yes, I know there's a Chirstmas tree in the background. These are New Year's Eve photos but they still look pretty much the same.
This is David holding a really big buritto from The Big Burrito in Kalamazoo. I miss him on the weekends I don't see him. Sigh.
Ok, now I need to go shower so I can go to the Katie/Steve bridal shower and give them glasses.
Evening Activity
Anybody want to go to Swan Lake tonight? I usually skip ballet, but this one has a bunch of kids I know so maybe I can resist giggling:)
Tuesday Blahs
I don’t really have allergies so it surprised me when I woke up this morning with a stuffy nose and painful ears. Since then my eyes have itched and after breakfast I started to feel naeuos (I think this is a result of the large amount of snot draining down my throat). So I feel kinda icky.
Past that, we finished striking set yesterday and cleaned up the shop. Technically, I don’t hve to go back there until fall. In reality, I start pulling and repairing things in two weeks. Eh, so it goes.
I don’t know what I’ll do with all my free time now that I’m not working 6:30-8:30 and grading at night. I actually went to Meijers yesterday, had time to talk to Mark and work on the yard (I’m still trying to get ivy to grow). Amy helped weed for many, many hours on Saturday so it’s kind of a big dirt patch, but it’s a nice dirt patch. I decided to replant ivy after explaining my Master Plan to David as we were looking out the kitchen window and seeing him squint and agree there was some ivy in a voice that sounded as though he didn’t actually see ivy he just believed I wasn’t lying and wanted to be supportive. We’ll see if this batch takes.
Other things I’ve been thinking about: what’s this about no rain falling before Noah? That seems a little wacko, but was part of the message on Sunday… anybody got research on this? I’m also thinking about the balance between personal faith and being a part of the institution of the church. I’ve been taking a break from the institution as I figure out the David factor (Ooooo….he makes me mushy!), but I do miss it. And I miss the people. And I’ve been making choices that leave me too busy to connect with people I love who are not family or David. Dumb me. I pray more when I’m busy busy, but I have more time in the word when things slow down. Also, I recently received the book Reading Christ, Reading Buddha. Anybody read it? I haven’t started it yet but feel I shall need to discuss it.
